Monday, July 31, 2006

Wedding Madness

I recently just attended my first wedding of peers (The Jesses wedding doesn't count, since I didn't really know anyone there except the couple). I've come back from Anna and Jon's wedding with thoughts that I'm surprised to find - I am really starting to feel older, despite my ongoing peter pan complex.

Love is a scary thing. If a million things hadn't happened just right, they wouldn't have ever met, let alone fall in love. In order for their story to work, so many other things had to transpire - friends relationships have risen and fallen, the original group where they met (Which I'm proud to be a part of) has gone through significant changes in the relationships between the various member, even in the last few months. Especially in the last few months. One of the reasons I'm so glad that this great couple got married is that I hope it will help to solidify the workings of our little family.

But how does it all work? How do you know when you've found that person? I've come to realize recently that the thing I fear more than anything is being with someone for convenience. I think that the fear of having a marraige with no love left in it has stopped me from continuing several relationships that I've ended for no real reason. And living in fear is just no way to live. Especially not fear of love. I could totally kick love's ass in a fair fight. Anyway, here's to the happy couple. I may not be joining you anytime soon, but I'm starting to understand why you people all do what you do.